A Surrogate Family

Authors Note: When reading the novel The Bean Trees, I acquired much information about the debatable topic of what makes up a family. With the information and symbolism that was provided in this book I was able to choose opinion about this topic. Therefore in this essay, I worked on portraying my opinion towards this topic. 

One thing that our society struggles with is the question of what makes up a family. When our genetic family fails to be there for us another option is to form a surrogate family with people who will love us.  The protagonist, Taylor, sets out to start a fresh life and constructs a new family. Family is not determined by genetics but love.

One of the most fundamental qualities that a healthy family will provide is a sense of acceptance and belonging. Family allows you to be yourself and doesn’t force you to be someone that you’re not. Every child wants to belong , a  sense of want and that they aren’t a mistake on earth. In the novel, Mattie steps in as a surrogate mother. When Taylor had no place to stay, a broken down car, and a two year old girl that was dropped off in her hands, Mattie takes her in like a lost pup. She fixes her car, and gives her a place to stay. These actions of acceptance showed love and kindness to Taylor, a young woman she had never met before.

When one doesn’t feel accepted by another you never feel comforted by them either. So when someone cares about you they accept you as a person, therefore you have a higher chance of feeling safe when you’re with that individual. Another essential quality of cohesive family is for there to be comfort and safety. For someone to feel safe with their family means that they don’t change who they are. They aren’t afraid of being judged or criticized because their loved ones are supposed to be the people who make them feel safe and secure about who they are as a person. The protagonist, Taylor, was always dealing with stress from the government and fighting to keep Turtle by her side. It was tiring and a struggle for her but after coming home she was admittedly comforted by the ones she loved, they gave her a sense of peace and safety. Even though her day was hard she knew that when she was home everything would be fine because they were there. Safety of your home will always bring realness and comfort if you are surrounded by family that produces love.

When someone shows you genuine love and they provide advise you tend to be more accepting to the wisdom they provide. In life, people who share no interest in accepting you or making you feel safe will try to give you advise but most people will have a hard taking direction from that individual. Advice from loves ones are beneficial, they want to you succeed in life. They don’t try to change you as a person they strive to encourage you. A lot of the advice that was given to Taylor was from Lou Ann, Mattie, and Esteban. These three people became Taylor’s surrogate family as she struggled to take care of Turtle as well as herself. Esteban acted like a Christ figure in the novel when he would provided his advice through stories. His advice was not commanding or diminishing he portrayed love through his advice. Advice that is given with love is advice that people will receive.

A surrogate  family will never be formed without the essential qualities that make up love. Therefore why does genetics matter when it comes to who your family is. Well it doesn’t matter a lot of times people will grow up in an unhealthy family, later on in life they will meet people who will treat them more like family than their own mother and father. The characters from The Bean Trees are not blood related but they become a surrogate family. Characters with different kinds of baggage and backgrounds have one thing in common: they are family.